The #1 Strangest Song is about… cannibalism!
And the #1 Strange Song according to me, is Timothy by The Buoys!
It’s about cannibalism. Dinner anyone?
Makes me want to break out into song:
People! People who eat people! Are the luckiest people…
Oh, wrong song. Sorry.
Timothy, words and music by Rupert Holmes
Trapped in a mine what had caved in
And everyone knows the only ones left
Were Joe and me and Tim
When they broke through to pull us free
The only ones left to tell the tale
Was Joe and me
Where on earth did you go
God, why don’t I know
Hungry as hell, no food to eat
And Joe said that he would sell his soul
For just a piece of meat
Water enough to drink for two
And Joe said to me, I’ll take a swig
And then there’s some for you
Joe was looking at you
God, what did we do
I must’ve blacked out just ’bout then
‘Cause the very next thing that I could see
Was the light of the day again
My stomach was full as it could be
And nobody ever got around
To finding Timothy
Where on earth did you go
God, why don’t I know?
For those just tuning in, each Monday morning, I’ve been posting my top 10 list of THE STRANGEST SONGS EVER.
DISCLAIMER: Don’t get me wrong, some of these are songs I adore. They’re just either about strange things people don’t usually sing about, or they just don’t make any sense.
The complete list:
#10 was Elton John’s Madman Across the Water, because it makes no sense.
#9 George Harrison’s, While My Guitar Gently Weeps, because it’s about housework.
#8, today’s Strangest song is… Gypsies, Tramps and Thieves by Cher. Yes, let’s all sell our women-folk into prostitution.
#7, the awesome dance tune, proving ultimately parody-able, PSY’s Gangnam Style.
# 6 is one of my fave tunes of all times. It’s Relax by Frankie Goes to Hollywood, on the list because we all wore those “Frankie says relax” T-shirts despite it being highly suggestive.
#5 is the Five Man Electrical Band’s Werewolf because instead of getting our son help, whether from a shrink or Dean Winchester, they chose to kill him instead!
#4 is Helen Reddy’s Angie Baby. It’s about a “special” gal who uses top 40 hits to seduce her would-be rapist.
#3 is The Night the Lights Went Out In Georgia. It’s about burying a body in the swamp. For a friend. C’mon. We’ve all done it. Oh, just me and Vicki Lawrence then. Okay.
#2… is Band of Gold by Freda Payne. What a great name for a woman who sings an ode to… impotence! Everyone’s fave! It’s not me, baby, it’s you.
#1… Timothy, because you can’t argue with cannibalism.
And that’s a wrap. Next week… inspiring billboards.